Posted on September 10, 2011 - by Megan

Adoption Update: 4 Weeks In

First, let me apologize for disappearing from blogland without explanation. When I found out four weeks ago that Baby Jonah had been in the hospital for several days with a fever so high he was convulsing, I knew I had to leave for Uganda immediately. In less than 24 hours, I boarded a plane in Atlanta and stepped on Ugandan soil two days later. The whirlwind before and after was epic, and that is no exaggeration.

Thankfully, Jonah has made a complete and miraculous recovery. For the first 7-10 days he didn’t smile, stand, walk or do much of anything except cry and beg to be held—all the time. It was heartbreaking and exhausting. He was so sick. It’s incredible to see him now, smiling all the time and walking everywhere. He is not the same child I met four weeks ago.

Moses came to stay with me only a day after I got here. It was a surprise to us both, since I expected we would get t know one another over several days before he came to be with me full-time. I think it was overwhelming for both of us.

Juggling two babies, one very sick and one in the troughs of incredible grief, shock and a very rough adjustment, brought me to my knees. Yes, in desperate prayer, but also, just in desperation. I can’t even describe the level of emotionally and physical exhaustion I experienced. It was too much. (I hope to write more about this in the future.) Thankfully, Joel was able to come early to help, and things have been much better since.

Moses is doing better and learning to trust us little by little. He is opening his heart to us a bit more each day. I think he is coming to see that we are here to stay and committed to him for life. That doesn’t mean that the awful raging is gone, the almost infantile neediness, or the formidable stubbornness, but they don’t dominate quite as much as we settle into our life together. Over the last four or five days he has been happy, laughing, and playful much of the time.

Joel and I have noticed that change (like moving guest houses, etc.) brings his issues back to the forefront again, and it takes several days to find our equilibrium once more. Thankfully, sanity does return in time.

I read this blog post last night, and it perfectly summarizes what I have experienced over the last month. Adoption is not so much a cause to champion as a daily commission to parent broken children.

What we realize now is that we have signed up for a lifetime of therapeutic parenting to children who the Enemy has sought to destroy. Their wounds and maladaptive behaviors will not be easily healed. Progress is hard-won and frustratingly slow.

The fact is that kids need families, they need moms and dads and a place to belong. Deep furrows of emptiness and loss are cut when these things are missing.But, we hold fast to the truth that Love is stronger than brokenness. Love heal. Love redeems.

We pray for Jesus to give us the strength to love boldly in the broken places and to use us as a means of grace and a balm of healing in the lives of our children.

Thank you for you unending love, support and prayers throughout our adoption journey and especially in the last month. We ask that you would join us again in praying for the final pieces to come together this week so we can come home soon.

Note: the picture above is one of local children, but not our children. We cannot post pictures of the boys until the court process is complete. Stay tuned though. It will be worth the wait:) They are seriously cute.